Tag Archives: Child Development

Free Range Parenting: How to Say I Don’t Love You

03 Sunday May 2015

Posted by in Aging, Communication, Crime, Ethics, Generational, Lessons of Life, parenting, Politics, Relationships

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Abandoning a child does teach a lesson: Parent's don't care

Abandoning a child does teach a lesson: Parent’s don’t care

The parent always correct. That is the basis of free-range parenting. The idea that a parent should be allowed to do whatever they want, including nothing, with their children.

I grew up in rural northwestern Colorado. The idea of ‘free-range’ is common in farming communities where it refers to animals. It means the rancher allows his animals to roam on open land, usually federal land and expends minimal personal resources on the care and maintenance of his or her livestock until it’s time to round them up for sale. The expectation is that some of the animals will be lost to predators, but the money saved by not feeding and watering them is worth the risk.

In parenting, ‘free-range’ is applied to the children of the mother and father. The concept is that children of almost any age will mature faster as unsupervised survivalists than under the care and monitoring of an adult. It is as stupid as it sounds.

Rafi and Dvora Meitiv: Children with a lack of parenting

This idea gained national awareness when Rafi, a ten-year-old boy, and Dvora his six-year-old sister were picked up by law enforcement when they were reported to be unsupervised about a mile from home. They are children of Danielle and Alexander Meitiv who believe that their children should be allowed to roam free on streets and in parks in order to learn the lessons that life offers. The parents have been charged with child neglect.

The real issue with free-range parenting is not one of parenting style. Parenting style requires that you actually take the responsibility to be a parent, which free-range parents don’t. Free-range parenting can be compared to having something of infinite value entrusted to someone, for which they go to the back door and throw it as far away has possible.

The critical issue with free-range parenting is assuming that children are born with an automatic sense of right and wrong. They are not. Children learn good behavior and they learn it from the human examples around them. Left on their own, many children experiment with cruelty and seek to satisfy baser desires, especially when one child is older and/or stronger than another child.

Parents have to constantly guide children to understand the concepts of boundaries, respect, kindness, responsibility, and humility. Often children battle against parents when told that certain behaviors and/or actions are not acceptable, but as a child matures they begin to understand that parents are acting out of love in teaching proper social behavior. They understand this, often because they see other people around them who lacked proper parental supervision and who are social failures as an adult.

A free-range parent is also setting themselves up for failure. The child will soon discover that the more they stay away from the parents, the less hassle they will experience, so the detach themselves emotionally from the parent. Once a child has found the parent to be irrelevant the opportunity for the parent to offer advice and guidance is lost forever.

PBS Station To Cut After-School Programming To Attract Donors

28 Wednesday Dec 2011

Posted by in About Reno, Communication, Customer Relations, Customer Service, Education, Ethics, Generational, Management Practices, parenting, Public Relations

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Paul Kiser

Reno, Nevada PBS affiliate, KNPB is cutting almost a third of its dedicated children’s programming and all of its dedicated after-school shows that target school-aged children. Effective next week all PBS Kids shows on KNPB will end at 12:30 PM, cutting 2.5 hours from its current 9 hours of children’s programming. The programming cuts will put KNPB third from the bottom of 30 western United States PBS stations in total hours of daily children’s programs  and the only PBS affiliate without after-school programming.

Kurt Mische, President and CEO of KNPB, denied that the station is cutting ‘all’ programming for school-aged children, and noted that programs like NOVA, Nature, American Experience, and Great Performances “are of great benefit…and interest…to school age children.” Those programs along with the Antique Roadshow will now air once a week at 5:00 PM after PBS News Hour and The Charlie Rose Show, which will fill the after-school time slots at 3:00 PM and 4:00 PM.   

Mische indicated that the programming changes are being initiated to attract donors and money, which school-age children are not providing to the non-profit organization.  He explained,  

“Making our changes will allow us to serve a larger audience of viewers…and donors…who not only watch but help to financially support our important service.”

Another PBS affiliate recognizes the issue, but has different philosophy regarding programming for school-age children. Ron Pisaneschi, the Director of Content for the PBS affiliate in Boise, Idaho (Idaho PTV) said that there is more programming competition for the attention of school-age children because of commercial children’s television on the cable channels, but added, “even though the audience is small, we want to serve them.” 

Hours of Daily Children's Programming of 30 Western US PBS Stations

Programs cut from KNPB’s schedule are The Electric Company for 6-10 year-olds, Cyberchase for 8-11 year-olds, Super Why! for 3-6 year-olds, WordWorld for pre-schoolers, and a second daily airing of Arthur for 4-8 year-olds. KNPB already had cut Fetch! for 6-10 year-olds earlier this year. The only two PBS stations with fewer hours of children programs are Rohnert Park and San Mateo, California. Both are in the San Francisco area market where PBS affiliate KQED has 19.5 hours of children’s programming in addition to a 24-hour PBS Kids channel. San Mateo PBS affiliate KCSM has only one hour of daily children’s programming; however, KCSM is currently up for sale and accepting bids until February 14, 2012.

Ironically, Mische’s attitude about the value of children’s programming to KNPB and to the State of Nevada was more supportive last year when he stated,

KNPB is proud to be a leader in education. At a time when education in Nevada garners its share of negative publicity, KNPB is taking action to impact education and life-long learning. We broadcast 52 hours per week of award winning, high quality, and trusted children’s programs that delight and teach youngsters.

KNPB 2010 Annual Report

The children’s shows, including all after-school shows will be cut effective January 2, 2012.

A version of this article first published as
PBS Station To Cut After-School Programming To Attract Donors

on Technorati.com

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Things I didn’t know about being a Father of a four-year-old Boy

28 Tuesday Sep 2010

Posted by in Branding, Lessons of Life, parenting, Passionate People, Pride, Random, Relationships, Respect, Rotary

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by Paul Kiser
USA PDT  [Twitter: ] [Facebook] [LinkedIn] [Skype:kiserrotary or 775.624.5679]

Paul Kiser

I am a Father three times over, but my first two were girls, which were relatively simple to raise and well-behaved…at least that is what I choose to remember. But the young boys I have known in my life are anything but well-behaved and I was nervous about being the Father of a boy. My son will turn five in a couple of weeks and I have realized that my nervousness was justified.  Here are a few of the things I didn’t expect about being a Father to a 4 year-old boy:

  • I didn’t know I would have to justify which route I took home from Starbucks. When the little guy in the back seat says, “Dad, why do you go home this way?,” you have to either play the ‘I’m-the-adult-and-that’s-why’ card, or you have to try to explain the subtleties of traffic, time of day, and the desire to travel on surface streets with the sunroof open. Wise or not, I usually try to explain things, because I’m a teacher at my core … but I’m rethinking that approach.

    Why IS the sky blue?

  • I didn’t know I would have to answer questions that force me to defend the stupidity of our language, like, “How come we say the alarm is going off, when it is on?” (i.e.; making noise). It’s a great question. Anyone want to field that one?
  • I didn’t know that going to the bathroom is a wait-until-you-only-have-seconds-before-disaster event and under no circumstances is possible upon suggestion by a parent.
  • I didn’t know little boys really did ask, “Why is the sky blue?” and expect an answer that they can understand. Have you ever tried to be the first person to explain the concept of a planet, the sun, photons, the atmosphere, and light absorption to someone? It is worse if someone else is present because it is like making lasagna, everyone has a better way of doing it.

    Alexander with of his cousin

  • I didn’t know that a four-year-old boy could flirt … and he’s really good at it … when the girl is at least three times his age.
  • I didn’t know how well a boy could manipulate …uhm, his Mom. This one happened today. “Mom, could I have another treat…because you love me?” Fortunately, I’m immune to such ploys!
  • I didn’t know a boy could have such joy over catching grasshoppers and bugs. It seems a cliché about a boy and bugs, but the desire to catch and detain anything smaller than him is hardwired in his behavior.
  • I didn’t know I would become aware of every child around me even when my son is not there. Why should I care? These other kids have parents keeping watch on them, but when I see a child about to do something hazardous the urge to usurp the other parent’s authority is sometimes overwhelming.

    Mowing the lawn is a team effort

  • I didn’t know I would have to wait to mow the lawn until he would be there to ‘help’ me. This was a recent quote, “Dad, I’m glad you waited until I got home to mow the lawn because I would be really angry with you if you had done it when I’m not here.” I have my orders.
  • I didn’t know that I could be attacked and beaten on with such zeal. I’m really hoping he learns to pull his punches before he gets too strong.
  • I didn’t know that a boy could change my attitude … about being the Father of a boy. Still, if you’re about to be a Father of a boy, we need to talk.
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